When you read nonsense like this, it’s clear you’re facing someone who seems to think it’s 1994 rather than 2014

So, prepare to guffaw now when I suggest what the next wave of music and culture looks set to be. Are you ready? I believe it’s prog rock … (Okay, perhaps the headline spoilt the surprise). Yes, progressive rock. The kipper tie or puffball skirt of music. The genre that brought us Genesis and Jethro Tull. A genre so embarrassing to talk about that, in a recent documentary, Prog veteran and regular Grumpy Old Man Rick Wakeman likened it to pornography: *lowers his voice* “here mate, you got any, erm, prog rock?”

It gets worse…

This lot grew up on the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. Game of Thrones? It’s like a Yes album sleeve come to life. Meanwhile, technical skills are being lauded. In an Emeli Sande-loving, talent show-filled, post-Strokes world, “they can actually play/dance/skate/dive” is a compliment not an insult. And what could be more fashionable right now than long greasy hair and double denim?

His failure to name a single new prog act demonstrates that he’s not only totally ignorant of the current grass-roots scene but too lazy to do even the most basic of research. No mention, for instance, of Steve Wilson’s ability to fill The Royal Albert Hall. Or the strong and undenied prog influence in bands like Elbow or The Decemberists.

And, for the love of God, spare us the prog equivalents of Ed Sheeran and Mumford & Songs, where were never “folk” in any meaningful sense of the word anyway. I would rather we didn’t see bands dressed in capes and wizard’s hats playing pedestrian indie-rock playing three chords on a Mellotron “ironically”.